I write this in August of 2020, while we are well into the COVID-19 global pandemic.  I started writing it in April while many parts of the world were on stay-at-home orders for all but essential workers (and I fear we may go back to that).  So many people have been touched directly by the virus.  Many others still are living in fear of the physical and economic survival of themselves and their loved ones. 

The Demand the Shimmer philosophy calls for people not to settle for “meh” and to make small tweaks in their daily activities to turn day-to-day life into something to celebrate.  Admittedly, as I crafted this road map for daily living over the years, the inconvenient ideas of “social distancing” and “sheltering in place” – and of course the much scarier ideas of widespread death and lasting economic turmoil – never crossed my mind.  Yes, I was aware that each of us are in different places in our lives and facing different demons; this means that Demand the Shimmer would manifest differently for everyone.  I still believed that anyone could find the approach useful in their quest for day-to-day happiness.  But, given the sheer enormity of what’s happening now, is this all just sort of frivolous?

I had planned to write a new blog in March (now I can’t even remember about what); when fear of the pandemic was all growing exponentially by the day, my first thought was to just stop.  Maybe just stop the whole thing – this whole philosophy or brand or whatever you want to call it – before it even really gets off the ground.  It’s just a fluffy little thing; meaningless in the face of what is really needed right now.  Right?

But as the weeks passed, I started to change my tune.  The mundane of day-to-day living is all many of us really have right now.  It’s the tiny things in your day – the bits of beauty and joy and fun that you find and choose to appreciate – that’s what will get us through this strange time.  And sharing our ideas of how to do that is a gift we can all give each other right now.

And then it was Memorial Day, and the world shifted again.  We seem to be at a new crossroads in the fight for social justice and against systemic racism.  Any of you who have been educating yourselves further will understand that true change will require people to become really uncomfortable. I believe that.  Platitudes about “good vibes only” that we see in memes and t-shirts may inadvertently serve to minimize the important work that needs to be done.  I’m now spending many of my daily walks this summer struggling with whether Demand the Shimmer smacks of toxic positivity.

I started this website and these blogs almost two years ago, and as I write this still hardly anyone knows about it, save a few people I chose to tell (after fighting off the butterflies) and anyone who randomly stumbled on it.  I was ready to bring this into the world on the edge of turning fifty – it was something I wanted to do for years and I set that as my goal.  And then I launched – I pressed the button and birthed demandtheshimmer.com.  And then I paused. And then I just got cold feet about sharing my ideas and products and coaching. 

I learned recently that one of the reasons people fear putting their dreams in the world is that they feel they can’t because they lack a degree.  Oddly, my PhD is one of the things that has held me back.  I am supposed to be a serious social scientist, after all.  I am supposed to only tout ideas drawn from rigorous empirical testing.  And in my day job, as a professor and researcher, that’s what I do.  But when I don’t have my scientist hat on, I spend a lot of my time crafting a life from ideas I pick up not only from science, but from self-development books and podcasts and just good ol’ trial and error of my own accord. 

I’ve been told throughout my life that I am full of joie de vivre, enthusiasm, and energy in my teaching, mentoring, and social life.  I’ve also been told that I have an amazing knack for work-life balance, time management, and organization.  We all have superpowers, and these happen to be mine; I put them together to form the foundation of Demand the Shimmer.  At first, I held back on sharing these ideas widely because maybe people would think they were dumb, or not serious and scientifically tested enough.  And some people will think that.  But maybe some people – even one person – will catch my spark and will be energized to see their lives differently and lean a little more  in the direction of joy.  Holding back because of my fears of approval may have kept someone from being just a little bit happier, perhaps when they needed it most.  That thought hit me hard. 

So what about that toxic positivity hesitation?  Here’s where I landed. I do not want to promote putting your head in the sand and avoiding hard conversations, fighting for what’s right, grieving, being angry at injustices in the world, and the like.  In fact, this post about the privilege of positivity smacked me right in the face when I read it and made me realize that I do these things way too much and need to stop.  Yet, that’s not what Demand the Shimmer is about.  It isn’t about putting on a happy face for the world and avoiding real challenges. It’s about self-care, intentionality, and elevating the ordinary to the extraordinary – for yourself and those around you – in creative ways. 

After I post this blog, I am taking steps to share this with my network and beyond.  People can take or leave what they like.  I have so many more ideas for ways to build this going forward.  I am not quitting my day job – I still love it and am proud of my career.  But this is so aligned with my purpose that I have to put it in the world.  Is this bad timing?  No, I think it’s exactly what we need right now.